Saturday at the bookstore

Today was slow. I was a little bit bitter that I was there, as I missed my day off for the big j.d. So I was basically screwed out of a day off, had to work on Sat morning, and basically wanted to bash my head against the wall because I somehow forgot, in the past four days, how FUCKING ANNOYING people are.

So this woman comes up looking for a book. Let's called it "Dark witchy woman." I look it up, say, "That's actually on the fifth floor in the science section."
"WEll," she says, "it's a BIOgraphy. It's about this woman."
"Perhaps it's about a women in science, which the description seems to indicate?"
"My friend said it was in biography."
"My computer says the book you want is in science."
"Your computer is mistaken."
"Well, I only get one title match for 'dark witchy woman,' so if that's the title you want, you could check on the fifth floor. In science."
"It's a biography."
Okay. This is the point where I sigh. How many times can we go back and forth? How many times can I show her the ONE result on my screen, which I searched by keyword and title? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST GO TO THE SCIENCE SECTION. THE BIOGRAPHY WOULD WORK TOO. just leave me alone.

I suggest that if she's really that opposed to checking science (and yes, she has confirmed that this dark witchy woman is a scientist) she might check bio under "F" because they're filed under last name. I explain that I'm not getting any results, but if she's sure it's a biography, she could try the second floor.

She says, "I'll just check back with someone else later," and then walks out the door.

What a freaking waste of time. Who is she going to check back with? Is there someone here more competent than I am? Is the fifth floor, with the handy elevator, too hard to go up to? We have an escalator as well! The possibilities are really endless when it comes to ascending the bookstore floors. It just makes me giddy. Elevator or escalator? What a choice! And to think that people dismiss these options because "it will take too much time" or "oh, that's too hard." Yes, having stairs that move and lift you up to the next floor is ridiculously labor-intensive. In fact, I've cancelled my gym membership because I have to go to these other floors at least ten times a day. It's like a hidden workout. Women's Health magazine is doing a spread on it. Stay tuned--next comes "Elevator Abs: How to make your ride to the fifth floor worth it."


I just can't wait.